I Believe He Loves Us All

For those of you who don't know me, I am a follower of Christ, mother and wife, and daughter of a lesbian.

God has been laying a lot on my heart lately, and I want to share it. I know it's opening myself up for criticism, but I will not hide behind that fear anymore, I know God created me, likes me, loves me, and has a plan for me greater than I could ever imagine.

I grew up in the Catholic school with divorced parents and a gay mom, and yes I punished for that, I was made to feel like a complete outcast, and made to feel like my family wasn't legitimate. There were parents who didn't want their kids near my mom in fear she would turn them gay? Or the gay would rub off? 

Because of all the people who preached hate about my family, about my mom, I lost faith in God. I don't remember in the bible where Jesus says, "hate thy neighbor and make them feel illegitimate at all costs." I wondered why me? Why couldn't I have a normal family?

Now by no means did I have a perfect childhood and an amazing relationship with my mom. I placed a lot of anger and resentment on her, for being who she IS, who God created her to be. However my husband grew up and experienced an absent mother, she wasn't LGBT, she is straight and grew up in a religious family. My point being I didn't have a rough childhood because my mom is gay, there's so many children who grow up with straight parents and are verbally, mentally and physically abused. It was because while everyone was preaching their hate, no one was thinking about the effects it has on the children of LGBT families. No one was thinking about how hard it must be for a 7 year old to hear her family isn't really a family, or that my mother was going to hell. That's a terrifying thought for a child! 

I thank God for never giving up on me, even when I gave up on him. I have a stronger, deeper relationship with him now than I ever knew existed. 

Being gay is a choice. I disagree, I know and love enough LGBT individuals to know it is not a choice. Why would people choose to be something that's discriminated against? Why would people choose to be something they have to fight so hard to be? Ya know what is a choice? Loving and accepting our neighbors the way they are. Speaking with love, hope and compassion. 

I know this may be a hard concept for some people to understand, but remember God created ALL of us, he LOVES ALL of us, and God has bigger plans for ALL us than we could ever imagine. 

I believe in committed same-sex marriages and believe God loves my family just as much as the family next door. I also believe if a commited same-sex couple wants to start a family, and a adopt a child, who am I to stop them? 

Who are we as society to stop people from living the life God has blessed them with? I certainly don't want to be standing in front of my almighty father explaining why I didn't love ALL my neighbors. 

My prayer is that people will remember the children of LGBT families when preaching hate, and know how much your words really do hurt.  (Heck I'm 26 and somethings I read still sting, luckily I've come a really long way in not living in offense.) Please remember God calls us to love thy neighbor. It is not our place to judge one another, it is our place to share Gods love for all of us, his greatness, and his promises. He is able, faithful and will not forsake you.

I fully understand this will not sit well with everyone, and I'm not asking you all to become same-sex marriage advocates (more power to you if you do), but what I am asking is to remember the children who are stuck in the middle of this awful battle, and that all the mean, nasty, awful hate preached is extremely hurtful and scaring for children. I respect everyone is entitled to their own opinon, but please don't hurt others trying to get your opinon across.

Be Kind. Be Grateful. 

Life Test

Things have been pretty hectic in my life lately! Operation move my grandparents from South Carolina to New York in less than a month, right before Christmas, made December fly right by! I felt like my to do lists were never ending and wasn't exactly sure how I was going to pull it all together but I knew I would! I am very grateful to have such amazing friends and family who are willing to help me and my family, without them I wouldn't be able to accomplish nearly as much as I do.

I feel like the past month, starting around Thanksgiving has been a life test for me. Remember in school you would have chapter tests and then one big unit test? That's what I feel like, I have accidently and purposefully been in a lot of situations lately where I am being challenged and need to overcome it. I have been in a lot of situations lately that would normally just make me flip a lid, cry, get angry, anxious, overwhelmed, and depressed. It seemed like God was testing me to see what I really did learn the past year, and how strong I believe in what I say, if I would remember what I had learned in these times of need, or if I would slip back into old habits and ways of reacting to upsetting situations. By the grace of God I was able to see this starting at Thanksgiving, and I had a great mentally ready for it, I remember saying in my prayers, "I know your testing me God and I'm ready, I know there is nothing we can't get through together". That was such a liberating feeling, it took away so much anxiety, fear, and worries!

Our original plan for Thanksgiving was to travel to my moms house and be with them and my brothers and aunt, but due to a forecasted snow storm we stayed home. I blogged about it, but long story short, instead of being upset we couldn't go, I got my game face on and made my very first Thanksgiving dinner by myself! And it turned out to be our best Thanksgiving yet! Along with everything that goes along with moving people from one state to another, that to do list was a mile long, I was on the phone getting estimates for moving companies and truck rentals, making reservations for traveling, I mean it was just a lot to organize and try to accomplish in a short period of time, but WE MADE IT! Thank you GOD we made it with only minor hurtles, both worked out just fine! Instead of taking a rental car we took a cab and it cost a little extra but ultimately the driver was awesome, and we snuggled in the back seat and chatted. The moving company didn't do what I asked them to do, so my husband had to correct their mistakes before we could leave, but we were still able to get on the road within reasonable time! THANK YOU BABY! I don't care who you are a 16 hour drive is a long drive to do and well that was an INTERESTING ride! Moving on... getting them reestablished up here, right around the holidays has been a little tricky and stressful but we are getting through it with smiles on our faces! I still wouldn't have waited until after the holidays, having them at my house on Christmas morning and them getting to experience all the magic that was going on at our house that day was priceless! It made it all worth it!

After this past month I can't emphasize enough how powerful positive thinking and gratitude practices really are! Two of the biggest changes I made in my life, that have ultimately saved me from living a negative, depressed, angry life. It's so easy to get caught up in the things that aren't going right in your life, and forget about all the good things that are going right in your life. There is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS something to be grateful for and when you are able to find the silver living in every situation, you will be so much happier! I know my God has poured blessings all over me and my family, we have had our struggles, but we always make it through, and that is by the grace of God, and I am truly with all my heart and soul grateful for that. Sometimes it can be easy to say God is picking on us, or he's not answering our prayers, but Pastor Buddy reminded us that, "God is not picking on us, he is pruning us." I couldn't agree more! I don't want God to solve all my problems for me, but I want God to help give me the strength and courage to get through my problems with love, compassion and kindness.

Take control of those negative, life sucking thoughts and turn them around into grateful thoughts. I don't care how silly the thought maybe, or its relevance to the situation, but it will get your brain waves going on a positive wavelength! It's all in your head!

As Always Be Grateful.