Life Test

Things have been pretty hectic in my life lately! Operation move my grandparents from South Carolina to New York in less than a month, right before Christmas, made December fly right by! I felt like my to do lists were never ending and wasn't exactly sure how I was going to pull it all together but I knew I would! I am very grateful to have such amazing friends and family who are willing to help me and my family, without them I wouldn't be able to accomplish nearly as much as I do.

I feel like the past month, starting around Thanksgiving has been a life test for me. Remember in school you would have chapter tests and then one big unit test? That's what I feel like, I have accidently and purposefully been in a lot of situations lately where I am being challenged and need to overcome it. I have been in a lot of situations lately that would normally just make me flip a lid, cry, get angry, anxious, overwhelmed, and depressed. It seemed like God was testing me to see what I really did learn the past year, and how strong I believe in what I say, if I would remember what I had learned in these times of need, or if I would slip back into old habits and ways of reacting to upsetting situations. By the grace of God I was able to see this starting at Thanksgiving, and I had a great mentally ready for it, I remember saying in my prayers, "I know your testing me God and I'm ready, I know there is nothing we can't get through together". That was such a liberating feeling, it took away so much anxiety, fear, and worries!

Our original plan for Thanksgiving was to travel to my moms house and be with them and my brothers and aunt, but due to a forecasted snow storm we stayed home. I blogged about it, but long story short, instead of being upset we couldn't go, I got my game face on and made my very first Thanksgiving dinner by myself! And it turned out to be our best Thanksgiving yet! Along with everything that goes along with moving people from one state to another, that to do list was a mile long, I was on the phone getting estimates for moving companies and truck rentals, making reservations for traveling, I mean it was just a lot to organize and try to accomplish in a short period of time, but WE MADE IT! Thank you GOD we made it with only minor hurtles, both worked out just fine! Instead of taking a rental car we took a cab and it cost a little extra but ultimately the driver was awesome, and we snuggled in the back seat and chatted. The moving company didn't do what I asked them to do, so my husband had to correct their mistakes before we could leave, but we were still able to get on the road within reasonable time! THANK YOU BABY! I don't care who you are a 16 hour drive is a long drive to do and well that was an INTERESTING ride! Moving on... getting them reestablished up here, right around the holidays has been a little tricky and stressful but we are getting through it with smiles on our faces! I still wouldn't have waited until after the holidays, having them at my house on Christmas morning and them getting to experience all the magic that was going on at our house that day was priceless! It made it all worth it!

After this past month I can't emphasize enough how powerful positive thinking and gratitude practices really are! Two of the biggest changes I made in my life, that have ultimately saved me from living a negative, depressed, angry life. It's so easy to get caught up in the things that aren't going right in your life, and forget about all the good things that are going right in your life. There is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS something to be grateful for and when you are able to find the silver living in every situation, you will be so much happier! I know my God has poured blessings all over me and my family, we have had our struggles, but we always make it through, and that is by the grace of God, and I am truly with all my heart and soul grateful for that. Sometimes it can be easy to say God is picking on us, or he's not answering our prayers, but Pastor Buddy reminded us that, "God is not picking on us, he is pruning us." I couldn't agree more! I don't want God to solve all my problems for me, but I want God to help give me the strength and courage to get through my problems with love, compassion and kindness.

Take control of those negative, life sucking thoughts and turn them around into grateful thoughts. I don't care how silly the thought maybe, or its relevance to the situation, but it will get your brain waves going on a positive wavelength! It's all in your head!

As Always Be Grateful.

Guest Blogger- AJ Richichi

Hi! My name is AJ Richichi. I’m a positive thinker and believe in a common good in all people. Over the past two years, I’ve been working towards creating and fostering a positive community online, as I understand that the internet can brutally negative. It’s called www.ChronicleMe.com.

As part of the ChronicleMe team, I feel comfortable saying that we all find joy and take pride in spreading positivity. I’ll use aninfographic campaign as an example. The company uses its’ designers, developers, and marketing dollars to launch huge awareness and education campaigns. Our campaigns include topics such as sexual assault, domestic violence, suicide prevention, and cyber-bullying. We’ve reached over a million people and have worked alongside some of the most influential self-help organizations in the world.

The campaign was successful because of our audience’s generosity. Countless people shared, re-tweeted, pinned, and re-blogged our initiatives. Because of these efforts we were able to make positive change in the world. For that, I am entirely and utterly grateful.

I love people!

Now that I've come out my deep dark hole of my depression, and discovered my purpose, I love interacting with people! I'll be honest after working in the tourism industry and working retail I developed a dislike for people, I didn't want to go anywhere I would see anyone I knew, I didn't want to engage in conversations with anyone, not even my husband. I thought my ideal job was a office with a computer and no phone. I am so grateful I am not in that same place anymore! I now know it wasn't really the people it was where I was at mentally, spiritually and emotionally and work is where I was physically. I was suppressing a lot of emotions, dealing with a lot of bull crap at work and didn't know how to balance it all, and deal with the stress. Most importantly I was ungrateful and a negative angry person. 

Fast forward... I'm at a point in my life where I have the self confidence and passion to strike up conversations where ever I go, I walk around with my head held high, smiling and engaging with strangers. There are so many nice people out there, not saying I haven't run into some unfriendly ones but I just let it go, and I don't take offense to it. 

I really enjoy interacting with my Happier friends all over the country. I made a dear friend in France, and I am really enjoying our growing friendship. I really look forward to her emails, they always make me smile. I'm very blessed and grateful she reached out to me! 

If you've read my blog you know I don't use Facebook, but I have gotten into Twitter. I like it there's a lot of great people to connect with, and so many ways to learn and grow. I happened to see the #bloggerswanted so I checked it out, I came across a tweet looking for guest bloggers, I thought to myself "Hey why not? I've got nothing to loose! This is an oppertunity to share my love of life with others. I sent and email and wouldn't ya know in less than 24 hours I got a really nice email about my blog and being a guest blog. I was so excited!! 

I'm grateful I stepped out of my comfort zone, and reached out. I didn't really know what it meant to be a guest blogger, I'm new to this whole world, but I'm really looking forward to sharing my guest blogger with you tomorrow! 

As always Be Grateful. 

A good reminder for myself...

I've been pretty busy lately, GOOD busy, not complaining! Monday night I went to bed with intentions on having a super productive Tuesday, my son was going to my sister in laws so I could get my work done and my to-do list was a mile long! 

Well that's not exactly how it all worked out, and I was resistant to readjust, which resulted in a depressing unproductive day! 

It all started when I woke up at 5 am having a coughing fit over a tickle in my throat that keeps reappearing in the middle of the night. It's been disturbing my sleep for a week now. So I got up had my coffee, watched Dr.Phil, and tried organizing my thoughts. THAT didnt happen, they were all over the place up, down, left, right, circles, and zig zags. I was barely able to process a complete thought before another one interrupted it. I should have taken that as a hint but I told myself I would work on my to-do list after I dropped my son off. 

Got myself back in a grateful mindset and got the kids up and ready, off to school and dropped off. That part was easy!

When I got home the battle in my head started, I made my to-do lists and put unreasonable expectations on myself for one day. Bad choice.

I was sitting on the couch and couldn't force myself to get up and doing anything. After awhile of arguing with myself I got some laundry folded, and more going. But I was still feeling disappointed in myself, and guilty for wasting a whole day and getting very little accomplished. Self pity and self blame, more bad choices. 

Finally around 1pm I textd my mom asking her if she had a minute, she said yes so I called her. I don't remember word for word what I said but it was something along the lines of, "Hey mom, I don't know what's going on today, I'm in a funk. I haven't felt this depressed in a long time and I don't even have anything to be depressed about. I can't even pick myself up off the couch and I have a mile long to-do list. I feel guilty for getting nothing done today. " 

I'm so grateful I can call my moms and they know exactly what I need to hear or be reminded of. She reminded me that I was choosing to feel guilty, and how busy I've been and it's ok to take time for myself. I needed to recharge so I could keep doing everything I need and want to do for myself, my family and others. And she was exactly right, I have been going hard lately, and I have a really busy month coming up, including a 16 hour road trip that I've been arranging to move my Grandparents home before Christmas. 

My mind, body and soul were trying to tell me to take a day of rest and relaxation, that should have been #1 on my to-do list. But instead I wasted the day wollowing in self pity and self blame. Had I thought about all the ways I could have used yesterday just to take care of myself, it would have still been a productive day just in another way. 

By the time I processed all this it was just about time to pick up my son, so I wasn't able to do much. But I went and got a cup of coffee and had a nice chat with my Wifey on her lunch break. At least my attitude was changed and I wasn't beating myself up anymore. I told myself it was ok and I'll get it done soon. After that I knocked two more things off my to do list without even trying! AMAZING!! 

It's nice to receive these reminders, it helps put life back into perspective. I know how important it is to take care of myself so I can continue being a great mother, wife, daughter, friend, and sister. I simply was forgetting because it wasn't my original plan, I failed to readjust, and I let the negative thoughts take over. Because of that failure I have learned and grown, I will remember to listen to my mind, body and soul and I will be more willing to readjust when my day gets fully flipped around. With that said, I fully welcome and embrace each failure, without it my personal growth wouldn't be nearly as meaningful and authentic. 

I am grateful for all the heartaches, failures, bad choices, and dark paths I took. Without them I wouldn't be the strong, compassionate, grateful mother, wife, friend, and sister that I am. I am enough. 

Be Grateful. 

Learn from your pain..

I know when life seems to be going wrong and nothing's going right it's hard to see why you are going through what you are going through. A popular question we always ourselves is, "WHY ME?" That's your self pity talking, tell it to shut up! Instead of feeling bad for yourself, do something about it, and if there's nothing you can do about it, pray about it and release it to your higher power. Let go of all things you have no control over. 

It doesn't matter if you believe in God or not, but I believe we were all put on this earth with a plan and a purpose, and even though we don't always know what it is, I believe we all have one. I didn't realize what my purpose or calling was until I was 26, and even now I'm not 100% sure, I don't know what oppertunities will arise in my future, but I will embrace the possibility! I will continue shining my light wherever I go! 

Clearly I didn't realize as I child why I had a rough childhood, I didn't realize it was because God knew I was strong enough to handle it, and would one day be able to help and inspire others who were goin through the same thing. 

I didn't realize that the feelings and  emotions I felt as a child, were to prepare me for being a good, present mother. 

I didn't realize I was rapped to be able to help other woman who have been victims of sexual assult. 

There's a lot I have been able to puzzle together lately and it's a good feeling to be able to sort it all out. So next time, instead of throwing yourself a pity party, embrace it, know one day will you be grateful for this life lesson, stay strong, and keep going! Don't let life get you down! 

Be Grateful. 

"Grateful Gracie"

I just got back from reading to my daughters class, I wanted to share with them a story about gratitude and not just because its Thanksgiving time. The book is called "Grateful Gracie" and it's written by a friend of mine Jennifer Tissot, it's a story of little girl who teaches her brother about the amazing power of positive thoughts and gratitude.  Grateful Gracie- A Story About Gratitude

I wish I was I had this book growing up, I knew the idea of being thankful for what I had because there were other kids with less, but I didn't have a true grasp on gratitude and the power it holds. Luckly 26 years later I do know the power of gratitude and try to share it everywhere I go. I try really hard to sincerely say "Thank you" everywhere I go, keep my head up and smiling, and remember everyone is fighting battles that we don't know about. It's easy to be thankful around the holidays, but its so much more rewarding to be grateful all year long!

I now know the power that being grateful holds behind it, and I am so grateful I can share it with my kids.  I now know my life is full of blessings all around me. I used to place a lot of my happiness into materialistic things, having a nice house, car, clothes, vacations, spoiling my children with luxury gifts, and wanting to be able to buy what I wanted when I wanted it. THANK YOU GOD FOR HELPING ME OPEN MY EYES!

It was when I was at the very bottom of the deep, dark, black hole of my depression, I had nothing to hold on to anymore, so I grabbed onto gratitude, put my faith in it, and gave it a try. THANK YOU GOD FOR A SECOND CHANCE! I started doing gratitude rituals at night, in the morning, when I was upset, when I was driving, whenever a negative thought came to mind. It didn't take long before I realized I wasn't having many negative thoughts anymore, and everything I was thinking about was how blessed I am, and all the good things I do have around me and in my life. THANK YOU NATALY AND HAPPIER TEAM!

I'm not going to say I don't get any mean and negative thoughts, but I choose not to respond to them, I choose not to give them any attention, I choose not to listen to the self blame, self doubt, and self hate. Instead I encourage myself, love myself, and forgive myself. If I am not going to, why should anyone else? If I can't love myself and how freaking awesome I really am, how can anyone else?  I am worthy of love, forgiveness and respect! SO ARE YOU!

Due to all the self hate I had going on I let it affect my marriage, I made very poor choices, and wasn't thinking about all the blessings I do have, instead I was focusing on all I didn't. I was looking at the grass being greener on the other side. Because of my bad choices, it resulted in more bad things happening in my life. I thought 100% my marriage was over. My husband and I dug really deep, had the conversations nobody wants to have, and put it all out on the table. We knew what we needed to do, we knew what we wanted to do, we knew we were meant to be, and that we could get through this. We are a work in progress, and so far so good! I believe the hell and back we went through was to help us open our eyes to how amazing our lives really are, and the blessings that God has poured over us. He gave us a second chance, and he helped us stay strong to protect our children from what was going on, while we got our acts together. I am so grateful for that!

I love that you can feel the gratitude in my house now, my husband, my kids, and myself try really hard to keep it grateful!

Be Grateful.

Support yourself!

For most of my life I didn't really believe in myself, I didn't see myself doing big things, traveling the world, having many accomplishments or living a wealthy life. BOY WAS I WRONG!! I'm pretty awesome! #justsayin

It was just recently that I realized I had been legit depressed my entire life, as far back as I can remember. That doesn't mean I didn't have any happy moments throughout my life, but the place I would go shortly after it was all over. It was kinda like being in a really deep whole, and peeping my head out for some fresh air every now and again, but I always went back down. Even with the births of my children, the most precious gifts from God, there was still a part of me that was depressed. My children fill me with so much love, gratitude, compassion and selflessness, they hands down saved my life. But there was still part of me that was miserable with myself, with my past, my lack of accomplishments, my lack of wealth and a ungrateful heart and mind. 

Thank you God for giving me so many second chances! 

When my world was falling apart all around me, it made it easy to see all the little things that I ever took for granted. It really helped change my perspective on being grateful for EVERYTHING I have and am! I realized how strong I truly was, I realized how much pain and suffering I was protecting my children from while my husband and I got out shit together. 

Once I was able to be aware of all the self doubt and negative talk I was doing to myself, I focused a lot of energy on kickin them out! It took a couple months but HOLY MOLY was it worth it!! 90% of the time my mind is only thinking grateful, positive and kind thoughts, it just does it on it's own now! And when any negative thoughts start going I shut them down and stick up for myself. 

In my head I am always supporting, encouraging, and being kind to myself, I DESERVE it!! I don't need to be mean to myself, or beat myself up about what I didn't get done, I just think tomorrow is another day! I did the best I could do today! I find when I start my day with a positive attitude, readjust to any speed bumps throughout the day, and try my best, there's no reason to be upset with myself, and if there is, I just forgive myself! 

I know it's nice to have the approval of everyone around you, and you want everyone to support you in what you do, but realistically it's not gonna happen. There will always be one downer, it never fails, but you can't live your life and make decisions based on others opinons and remarks. I know I have God and my Gaurdian Angels always on my side, and they will help me and protect me, and have a plan for me. I know if something doesn't work out, that's ok, it wasn't meant to be! 

Be Grateful.